First week post op

First week items:
– you will be scared. People who love you will be scared too. But when they hug you and kiss your forehead, it’s like a shield of armour. Let them know you love them too, no matter how cheesy it sounds. 

– the Harry Potter robe made for lots of hospital cheerleaders 

– load your iPod, don’t trust hospital wifi, bring a sleep mask 

– the two most annoying things from the hospital will be being woken up for your vitals and the IV drip alarm (especially when it gets to ignored angry volume) 

– if you have awesome hospital staff, let them know. Bailey, you were my homegirl!

– the worst part and I mean worst, is the swallow test. Your throat is dry, you can’t really talk, you’re still sore, they stand you up and give you this 6oz cup to drink….which I did and then I threw it straight up. Which made them give me more. 

– SinFree Sorbet is like heaven when you make it to stage 1 diet. 

– shitting yourself is going to happen. Be humble. Say thank you.

– if your hospital roomie doesn’t have the TV on…..keep your own at a god damn reasonable level and try and turn it off at night. TV was on from Wednesday to Friday non stop & loud.

– if a tech spills human waist on you, it’s ok to ask that the tech isn’t assigned to you anymore. Especially if they make you feel like a burden.

– Once you can poop regularly and not have liquid diarrhea you feel like the king of the world.

– I have 5 incision scars. The one I call the second belly button is the worst. It’s like wearing a button down shirt that is slightly too small for you and when you sit or lean forward you fear the button will pop. I took a photo of my scars, eventually I’ll post photos.

– dreaming of food is still a common occurrence. So far I’ve had a nightmare about pizza and soda and a lustful daydream for panera’s lemon orzo soup and a side of bread.

– isopure zero carb drinks were too high in sugar alcohols and made me rush to the bathroom 

– grocery shopping cost me $7

– finding items that are less than 3g  of sugar and 5g of fat is really hard. (But Edy’s slow churned sugar free chocolate ice cream is amazing and fits the rules)

– every thing is so sweet. I’ve had to cut my tea/lemonade mixture with water.

– an app to remind you to hydrate is fantastic. However it’d be awesome if you could snooze those reminders when you take a nap.

– I haven’t been taking my depression medicines because crushing up pills and putting them in pudding or protein drinks just doesn’t help it and it makes my tounge numb. 

– it took me a few days to get up to walking a mile. Once I did, I slept for two hours afterward

– I pin my drain to my shirt and rock it like a badge of honor. It just makes it not hurt as much as it would if I let it hang. 

– I feel like I have mastery skills when I strip my drain tube of gross stuff

– I was able to sing at rehearsal but laughing made my side hurt

– drinking a homemade protein drink that is only 8oz makes me so damn tired. Like thanksgiving food coma tired. 

– my cats have been adorable protectors. However, “no belly” has been shouted several times.

– so far each day it’s been I have too much energy to just lie in bed but not enough to actually do something 

– passing gas is the roulette of am I going to shit myself or not

– I stopped taking the pain killers 3 days from being released from the hospital.

– EC’s subway smelt so good the other night. I just wanted a bite. One on one food things are ok but I’ve been avoiding eating with groups.

– Thursday morning my drain will be taken out and I can eat purĂ©ed meats and mashed potatoes. I can’t express how happy that makes me feel and how grossed out I am at the same time.

– I will always love butterscotch pudding 

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